Elf Life

Posted Wed 10-21-09

Filis circles wiseguy elf in his gladiator gear, like a pretty shark narrowing in on its lunch.

FILIS:

Dope! We can only hope the Cesspool elves are as stupid as you! I'm going to murder you in ten seconds. Put up a defense! 10 -- 9 -- 8 -- 7 -- 6--

WISEGUY:

Hey! Stand still! You're really making me have to work for that kiss!

Baughb goes through his to-do list while action happens off-panel.

WISEGUY (off-panel):

Hey, wait! What are you --

SFX:

CRACK! THWUP!

BAUGHB:

Oofa! I forgot to schedule the medics!

The other recruits watch in horror as wiseguy's fancy helmet tumbles through the air.

Baughb explains it all.

BAUGHB:

As you men can see, the female knee can be a formidable weapon in its own right. But your most important weapon is always your brain.

WIMPY:

Gulp!

SON:

That was awesome! Can I put his head in my bucket?

WIMPY:

N -- no, son. It's still attached. I hope.

BIFF:

Darn! That went by way too fast. Let's look at that again -- in slow motion.